The Wonderfully Misguided Adventures of a Heroine
by CX Darth Yoda Is Awesome XD
Summary: Dib needs help against Zim. He gets it. Aaand then things happen. What sort of thing you ask? Well, generic pairings with OCs, team switches, constant arguments with the word 'annoyed' overused a lot, maybe even an explosion here or there. Oh, yeah! This. Is. Going. To be. GOOD! (The actual fic "Rag Becomes Beautiful" advertises if that makes you any more interested.)
1. Chapter 1

**Alright. New story! I'm just gonna do this one when I'm not feeling the other one. I have half the next chapter for "I'm a Pirate..." (if you're reading it, which is VERY doubtful), but I wanna do something that doesn't go with something that's already written for me. So, yeah. Invader Zim. I suggest you read the AD first on my profile. It has some more stuff on my character, what I plan to do with her, why I'm doing it etcetera, etcetera. Bluh.**

**Also, no promises on brief updates, or long chapters. Sorry. :'( As said above, this is just a side story for when I'm not feeling the other.**

**Disclaimer: Rolf won't let me use his farm animals, now, so I'm not even gonna try. _Jhonen Vasquez owns Invader Zim._ No me. He. _Si_? Good-y.**

* * *

><p>Dib walked in his room after a particularly aggravating day, indeed. Between Zim's newest "master plan" and Mrs. Bitter's pop quiz on how much doom the government is causing Dib had enough. There was no difference in his now ragged and burned appearance, except the fact that his glasses were now cracked. 'High frequency tones' his foot. The peoples' crashing cars and running into walls were more disastrous than a few broken light bulbs…And lenses.<p>

He tossed his backpack in the general direction of his closet before collapsing on his bed, almost immediately drowning himself in sleep.

It was then his laptop started to make annoying high-pitched squeals. Thoroughly miffed at this point Dib flung himself upward and slouched in front of his computer. He clicked his mouse a few times before a silhouetted figure with narrow eyes popped up on screen.

"Agent Mothman!" cried Agent Darkbooty in an aggravated tone. "We have been attempting to contact you all day! Where have you been?"

"Uh, skool?" Dib answered, putting out a small flame that started at the sleeve of his coat, where it was smoking earlier.

"Oh, yes…Of course…" Dib rolled his eyes. "I mean NO EXCUSE! You are to answer when called regardless of necessary education for your future. Now, onto business."

At this excitement etched its way across Dib's face and played with his emotions. Oh, boy! This was a mission for sure! Actually, no.

"We cannot support your alien claimings for much longer, Agent Mothman," Darkbooty informed. At this Dib's face fell. "Unless you give us proof that your neighbor's what you say he is we can't keep playing this game."

"GAME?" Dib exclaimed, launching into hysterics. "This isn't a game, sir! This-This is the future of HUMANITY! This is-this is…LOOK AT MY CLOTHES! You think a game did this?"

Darkbooty's silhouetted eyes narrowed, "Agent Mothman, there are some people at HQ who believe you, me not included, but if this continues without any support, then…" Dib winced at the sound of a sickening squish. Darkbooty turned to his right screaming, "AGENT LOCHNESS! WHAT did I tell you about the HAM CUPCAKES!"

"Wait, Agent who?" Dib interjected.

A squeal of excitement could be heard off screen followed by a crash.

"NO!" Darkbooty cried, his silhouette running off screen as well. "Not the hippoman fossil! LOCHNESS!" Another crash.

Dib watched his screen blankly for some time before Darkbooty returned on screen, the noise gone, now.

"Now, where were we," Darkbooty said as though nothing strange happened.

"Was that Agent Lochness?" Dib inquired curiously.

"Yes," Darkbooty scowled (at least it looked like it considering it was just a silhouette that was visible).

"THE Agent Lochness?" Dib asked again.

"Yes…" Darkbooty seemed to be losing his patience.

"Well-"

"AS I WAS SAYING!" Darkbooty said complete irritation obvious, now. "You will have a total of eight weeks to give evidence of your neighbor's being an alien. Otherwise, we'll have to drop you as a Swollen Eyeball."

At this point Dib was getting desperate, all concerns about Agent Lochness tossed away.

"Well, maybe if I had some HELP I might be able to do that!"

There was a pause, and another crash. Darkbooty cried in anger again, running off screen, but not before yelling a childish 'fine!' closing the subject.

Dib's laptop screen blacked out, leaving Dib to his thoughts. "Fine?" Did this mean that Dib was going to get a partner? Finally?

Yes, yes it did. Dib tried to continue the rest of his day (falling asleep) but couldn't seem to control his thoughts enough. He, Dib Membrane A.K.A Agent Mothman, was finally getting a partner against Zim. It was perfect! That alien scumbag had better watch his back now! There was no stopping humane justice, now!

* * *

><p><strong>Any typ-os you saw? Lemme know. Anything you like? YOU BETTER LET ME KNOW! Anything you absolutely hated and wished I'd never go with that you want argued with an annoying, pathetic excuse? Yeah, hit that little review button down there. I'll read it...Most of it...Maybe...<strong>

**Hope you enjoyed! Please be constructive and not mean. I'm already insecure with my writing style. **

**Violets117 and Killi2.0, you've helped me write this with your reviews! Thank you!**

_**Darthy out.**_


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2! I was originally going to post this along with a new chapter of "I'm a Pirate", but some things happened, and I needed to get my C in Lit. up, so my computer was taken away yesterday. I brought it up to almost a B, already, so I got my laptop back. This just needed to be proofread, and submitted, so I scanned it, edited the dialogue so it made more sense, and BLAM here you go. It's time I went to sleep, and I'll be lucky if I don't get in trouble for typing like I am in the middle of the night, so here you go! Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Yeah, me no owny the showy...**

* * *

><p>When Dib woke up the next morning, he automatically knew something wasn't right. His head was just screaming at him that there was something out of place, but what? Cautiously, Dib strained his hearing to try to find out if what was wrong could be heard. Nothing out of the ordinary…His dad was making noises in their basement, he could swear he heard the pig noises from Gaz's game, so what was wrong?<p>

"HI!" a face suddenly appeared in front of his own, from the side of his bed. Dib automatically screamed and fell back, halfway leaning out of the window before a pair of tiny hands grabbed the collar of his pajamas and tugged him back in.

Before he knew it, his forehead was pressed rather tightly against the forehead of someone with blue eyes and dark bags. He could tell the owner of said eyes hadn't slept in weeks and was smiling hysterically.

"Like I said, 'HI!'" exclaimed the stranger grinning maniacally, tossing him back to the head of the bed while she sat on the other side.

Finally, getting some space, Dib took the opportunity to scan her over. She was a tad shorter than him, with navy blue hair that ended at her chin and curved up to a point. As he noted earlier she had light, sky-blue eyes with dark, deep bags lining them. She had an ugly brown shirt on, under a black coat with sleeves that could brush the ground at her full height. Dib guessed she was a year or two older than him.

"Who are you?" Dib exclaimed, carefully putting his glasses on while keeping an eye on the girl. His hand was shaking due to his near death-fall out the window.

The girl's face fell into seriousness, suddenly, as she hopped off of his bed and held her hands behind her back in a military manner.

"Agent Lochness, class II agent of the Swollen Eyeballs. Your new partner from here until we capture and detain alien subject 9999-"

"Wait," Dib started incredulously. "You're Agent Lochness?"

"-99999999-"

"Uh…Hello?" he leaned over his bed, reaching a pale hand to poke her. Just as he was about to come to contact with her face she slapped his hand out of the way, still repeating "99999."

"Okay, I get it," the scythe-haired boy said, annoyance dripping from his tone.

"9999998217," she finished, smiling smugly at him. "I'm only assuming you're Agent Mothman, correct?"

"Er…Yeah," Dib smiled awkwardly. "I wasn't expecting someone over so early, let alone you…"

Lochness shrugged a shoulder, letting her sleeve covered arms fall to her side, "I heard you were a fan of mine, and I needed a case, so I took it."

"Yeah! I've heard some great stuff about you!" Dib exclaimed, his geeky-side showing.

"Then, you don't mind if I quiz you?" Lochness asked, cocking her head slightly forward, challenging him.

"Bring it," Dib smirked.

"What's my most successful case?"

"Case number 181: Chase of the Lochness Monster. It was also your first, and where you got your agent name."

"Anybody knows that. What's my second most success-" Dib was at it before she finished.

"Case number 1,387: Fight Against the Weasel-Faced Spirit. It would have been your first if you actually had pictures instead of just giving your word."

Lochness leaned forward, "Between you and me…" she handed over a yellow folder. "I actually did have pictures."

Dib took the folder and looked at the contents. Inside were slightly faded and wrinkled photos of Agent Lochness locked in an epic combat against the ghost of a weasel-man hybrid. Dib's jaw dropped.

"You couldn't turn the photos in-"

"Or my face would be shown to the council," she finished, smirking. Dib knew she had a thing for keeping her face hidden from absolutely everyone in the high council, due to her paranoia. It said in her file that she felt they needed to show their faces in order for her to show hers. Otherwise, she would tend to be vain as reports of her past partners have stated."I need you to keep and/or destroy 'em. My last partner almost tuned them in after I told her not to, so…"

"You can trust me!" Dib smiled.

Lochness gave another wide grin before gasping suddenly, eyes wide. Dib jumped and looked around him before seeing that she was looking out of his window at Zim's base. He smirked, knowing she was one of the Swollen Eyeballs most successful agents, therefore ensuring Zim's doom.

"Look at the cute puppy!" Lochness exclaimed leaning out the window, waving at a green and black dog, whose eyes were dilated. The dog smiled and waved back almost as enthusiastically.

"What are you doing?!" Dib cried out, pulling her back in by her long sleeve and closed his window, making sure the curtains were shut. "That's Zim's robot! He's pretty much harmless, but if he sees you, then Zim will almost definitely know you're here!"

"That was a robot?" Lochness asked incredulously. "I had no idea! He's obviously a genius if he can disguise his robot so cleverly." Lochness narrowed her eyes and clenched her hands into fists (which Dib wouldn't have noticed if not for the sudden ball in her sleeve).

Dib rolled his eyes and facepalmed. Maybe she wasn't the brightest bulb in the package after all. She couldn't even tell that GIR was wearing a cruddy, cheap costume. He started to regret asking for help of the Swollen Eyeballs.

* * *

><p><strong>Hope you liked it okay! If not, please let me know why, and if so, tell me what you liked so I may include it in future chapters! Thank you!<strong>

**Also, I'm looking for a beta reader. Any help is appreciated! PM me if you know anybody willing, please. All of my friends aren't really Fanfiction friendly, so I'm allll allllone. XD**

**Thanks, again! See you next chappie, hopefully!**


End file.
